You think that you have become smarter, more cautious, aware, less oblivious, more paranoid and protective. Indeed, it has been a long time, since the days I were naive and innocent, til now, and though in actual fact, I'm still very much that little girl, I've grown.

It's funny how things that have happened so long can repeat itself, and they never change. I thought that after a heartbreak, I will be more steadfast, decisive and ignorant to any temptations. However, reality is I always have it good. As bewildering as it sounds, I have been fortunate to have many to pamper me. Pamper = care, concern, gifts without me whining, gestures of affection e.t.c. Yet these few have been the ones who have stabbed me deeply - unwillingly, unintentionally, without much care nor concern of the aftermath.

When I think I can walk away, recover, heal and remove all the pain, it is often hard when I see and reminisce on the objects and memories that make me remember. All I wish is a closure. A fact that that few months of attention has not gone to waste. Short, but I always find it a pity that beautiful things are often abrupt. It was difficult, to repress the feelings because we both know that there is nothing and there will never be anything again.

Feministic emotions of jealously and envy can arise by the simple actions you do. I try to purge them out, shut my eyes and dream of the grasslands, because I believe I yield nothing and should never need to ask you to account to me. I'm content, at peace and relieved, that a conclusion has been drawn. We reached a mutual understanding, a respect, and kept the distance. Instead of the anger and displeasure, we did our updates and remain objective - what needs to be said is said and those that didn't, ignorance is bliss.

We did not talk much, but at least we finally did, as usual selves, forgetting the tumultous past and ensuring that a pure and simple friendship remains.